Tuesday, May 17, 2011

House of Blues

Warning: 
 There is going to be gratuitous moping. Because this is my blog and I can. 
You don't want moping? Scroll down for some pictures of puppies. Go on.

Here's the thing. My penchant for home decor/DIY blogs is pretty masochistic at this point. As you might know, Zach and I have been under contract on a house. Our first house. The perfect first house. For about 3 months now. We are at the last step, which is actually securing financing. We didn't anticipate this being such a hurdle. We make a good living and the projected mortgage payments are less than we are currently paying in rent. But we've been rejected once already. Bummer.

We are experiencing first hand the ridiculous knee-jerk reaction to the banking meltdown, where once banks were lending to everyone, now they are lending to no one, and I'm writing now because I have been in such a funk just waiting for that next rejection that I feel is sure to come.

I've always been a journal writer, scribbling little thoughts and bits that weren't really meant for anyone else. And up till recently (aka when I met my husband almost 3 years ago) all these thoughts were about boys. Seriously, from age 12 onward. Get a grip, Marg. But, anyway, sharing this stuff is new for me. I know its not the typical post, but... it's what's going on.

I stopped writing for a while, and then when I resumed, (sporadically) my journal seems to have taken on a much more adult tone. What do I want to do for a living? Where will we live? 

Small questions, big implications. 

So I guess I'm just having a pity party for myself over here, because while I am thankful to have health, a wonderful family, a job and a place to live and food on the table, I can't help but feel so darn down in the dumps. Not that it's even in the same arena, but I almost feel like that if we don't get this house, its like a couple who can't conceive. It's something you want so much and you're just so ready and you want this next part of your life together to start, already!

So, after having gotten my hopes crushed at multiple stages of this home buying process, only to have them feebly inflated once again is really taking its toll on my spirit.

I hope I will look back on this post (hopefully someday soon) and be a little embarrassed about how melodramatic I'm being. I don't know, maybe you guys can relate?
Ok. That's enough of that. 

Here are some pictures of puppies. 

4 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear you are down. I will send positive energy your way. Good Luck!

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  2. haha thanks girl! Your house is lookin awesome these days, by the way!
    xo
    marg

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  3. The home buying process is pretty much modern day torture. You'll get through it and it will be SO worth it. Good luck!

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  4. Fingers crossed for you. Don't give up and keep thinking positive.

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